Is Mr. PFI in My Garden Patch?

You are aware of my recent heartache but I’m big girl and haven’t been allowing myself to sit still. You may think I move too quickly (that maybe the overall problem maybe I need to chill for a minute) but anywho, I decided to go on a date the other day.

I must admit I met this guy on Black Planet (side note for the ladies: if you want to meet men just to date and get to know check out Black Planet the men are persistent). Getting back on point; I was impressed after conversing with this man who happens to be a very sexy Personal Fitness Instructor aka Mr. PFI. He was just leaving work himself and wearing sweat pants and a sleeveless tight fitting top. He has the perfect body. His arms are to die for, OMG words can not describe. He has a medium build and my God every muscle on him is cut to perfection with a brown skinned handsome face. If he was a little darker and taller he would be perfect. But I’m trying not to be too choosy and overall he is FINE anyway!

So when he spontaneously invited me out a couple of nights ago to meet I said what the hell, why not. I decided we should meet at a location of my choosing and selfishly chose a place not to far from my house because it was a work night. Now granted the Waffle House is not romantic I happen to love their coffee which I can drink 24 hours a day. Besides if he was the cheap type I can afford the Waffle House no problem.

He arrived before me due to a miss communication. He was supposed to call me when he was heading there not when he was already there so I had to freshen up change clothes, etc. When I arrived I was little turned off to see he had already eaten. He could have waited but I wasn’t that hungry anyway and I ordered coffee. I noticed the slightly aggressive and confident way he signaled the waitress to come over and get my coffee pronto. I liked that, it was sexy! We talked health and fitness most of the night after all that is his profession. At one point while sneaking more sugar in my coffee and noticing he was watching I told him this will probably not work I would have a complex being around him. He then said sugar isn’t good for me as well as coffee but he did just have syrup on his pancakes. I guess that was his attempt to make me feel better. Our conversation was fairly deep. He happens to think eating healthy is a cure for homosexuality and mental illnesses. He said both are from a chemical imbalance and proper nutrition would remedy that situation. I told him in regards to homosexuality many would disagree with him. He said he was aware of that but he could back it up with facts. We talked spirituality, holistic medicine, why he prefers older women, and his Army brat days. I also mentioned how I would have expected him to be more attracted to a petite and totally in shape girl. He said “do you realize how beautiful you are, you must not hah”? I kind of straightened my back up thinking hell yeah I am beautiful. Actually I preach that a lot but it’s just a farce I really don’t believe that most of the time; but for that moment I felt it. Then he said “besides you carry most of your weight in your lower body that’s sexy”. Ok, that did it for me I was sitting up super duper straight then, flipped my hair back and batted my eyelashes and said thank you.

I then asked him what plan would he put me on if I was a client to loose weight and get in shape. He said he would need to know my weight, height, body measurements and BMI. I told him he would never ever know my weight. He asked why he has seen 400lb women come in all the time. I said granted I’m not 400lbs he will still never ever know. He asked if he could sit beside vs. across from me. I said sure. He comes over and starts tickling me saying he was going to tickle me until I told him my weight. I eventually gave in and said he could give me a good guess. I had him go up some until he got the number right. He said see that wasn’t that bad was it? I actually agreed it wasn’t. That’s a HUGE PLUS I felt comfortable enough to tell this man my weight and didn’t feel bad afterwards. The night progressed and about 2 hours later he walked me to my car. As I was backing up and pulling out of my parking space I expected to see him in his car. Instead exiting the parking lot I see him standing on the curb trying to cross the street. I said DAMN this man don’t have a car. I drove by and waved and then decided to call him and said you don’t have a car. He said no he caught the bus. I felt bad and offered to take him to the airport so he could catch the bus. So I turned around and picked him up. He said he had a car but the transmission went out on him and he hasn’t been able to get it fixed.

I will go out on a limb and say I believe the average woman would be turned off or simply exclude him as an option. But should we? I know there have been times I didn’t have a vehicle. That didn’t decrease my worth in any way; at least not in my eyes. But I know women and the first thing they will say is “he doesn’t have a car, ummmmm”. See some women equate a man with no car with a man who is broke and I don’t think that’s always the case. I think women in some instances can miss out on finding a good man because of what he doesn’t have materially vs. what he provides spiritually. This lady once told me that I should only date men who are from the same garden patch as me. She said I was a gorgeous apple and I shouldn’t allow myself to roll down and associate with other apples in a different part of the garden. She said she preaches to her daughters the same thing “stick with the apples in your garden”. I found that rather interesting because she was a devote churchgoer at Bishop Eddie Long church in Atlanta. She said the bible says the same thing “to be equally yoked with your mate/spouse”. I was fascinated because to me that goes against everything the bible preaches. Most women worry about presenting a man to their friends or family who may not have much or a car because they think it reflects poorly on them. Their concerned their own image will be diminished because of his lack of status or car.

Sometimes I even get caught up in image. I try not too but peer pressure or thinking what others will think of you can be a bitch. Maybe we should work with men more because SOME (not all) have excellent potential. As Kayne West says “He gone make it into a Benz out of that Datson. He got that ambition baby look in his eyes. This week he mopping floors next week it's the fries. So, stick by his side. I know his dude's balling but yeah that's nice and they gone keep calling and trying but you stay right girl”.

I don’t know where me and Mr. PFI will lead but I’m taking things slow either way so it’s all good! Please share your thoughts from a male or female perspective.

Feel Free to Read Me Again until the next time Peace!